Grownupish

There’s this awesome blogger/youtuber I follow named Cassandra over at Becoming a Farm Girl who resonates with me. She has all the awesome hobbies I do (actually, also the career)

• she cooks from scratch
• she cans (although she does pressure canning, I do not….yet)
• she gardens
• she’s an educator
• she’s really cool 🙂

And one of the things she does regularly is her ‘meal sequences’, where she cooks one thing for dinner on Sunday, and the rest of it becomes the base for the rest of the meals for the week. “With a costume change”.

I kinda cook like that, only with my family it looks different. I’ll often cook one huge batch of protein (chicken, pork, even beans) and then use what’s left to make new stuff. You’ve seen it over the last few menus, I made a pulled pork batch that became pork tacos, then BBQ pulled pork sandwiches, then the leftovers went in the pork chili. Sometimes it’s that planned.

Sometimes it’s…more flexible. All the cooked veggies for the week (no matter what they were) will go in a soup. Or whatever fruits are on the edge of overripe will go in a smoothie, or a pie, or ‘fruit goo’ for yogurt.

I try to use everything up, and I try to make things not feel like leftovers. Even if they are just leftovers with a costume change. Looking in my fridge this week, that’s a whole lot harder, because I did such a great job using stuff up. But what I do have that has to be used up:

• Various veggies (bell peppers, half a cabbage, carrots)
• Lots of eggs
• A few boiled potatoes
• A whole mess of cheeses (sliced, block, and shredded)
• A pound of bacon

Which looks to me like a really excellent breakfast on Saturday (eggs, bacon and home fries) and a vegetable soup to pack for lunches next week. But that sounds like breakfast and lunches, not dinners. I am declaring the fridge officially ‘cleaned out’ of dinner food.

This week my meals are going to take advantage of the fact that pork loin is really cheap at my grocery store. I’ll buy 2 (BOGO) and butcher them into 4 thin pork chops, 2 pounds of stew meat/stir fry meat, one roast, and whatever else I can get for the freezer. It’s less meal sequence and more meal strategy.

Saturday: parmesan crusted (pork) with leeks and apples, I found the recipe here but I believe it goes back almost 2 decades to a really old Cooking Light recipe. I’ll make rice and roasted butternut squash with this. I’ll make a double batch of rice to make ahead for Sunday.

Sunday: Sous vide pork chops with ginger scallion sauce and rice (leftover from Saturday). Steamed broccoli and carrots will accompany.

Monday: Leftovers – it’s always leftovers on Mondays

Tuesday: Some sort of quick Indian pork curry, I’ll serve this with Naan and cauliflower from the freezer. I’ll steam the cauliflower and mix it into my curry, The Kid can have some on the side, and the rest will be saved for a future meal.

Wednesday: We’ll need a pork break. I’ll make the turkey pesto meatballs from last week that never got made last week and serve them over pasta. We’ll eat whatever leftover veggies there are, or maybe pull some frozen kale out if we need to.

Thursday: leftovers

Friday: I think the plan is to find a gift card from the forgotten pile and go wherever it takes us.

This week I’m short on time…let’s just do 5 teeny tiny things that make me grateful this week

• Black tea. I’m not a coffee drinker, so this gets me through the sleepy days.
• Friends who bake. Treats in the office first thing in the morning are like a hug from a friend.
• Music. The kid had a concert today, even middle school music is beautiful and makes life better.
• The weather. It’s been lovely and clear here, and not too hot.
• Chocolate. nuff said.

I did better this week…but also still have lots to work on, so we’re going to mix it up this week. Starting today, Tuesdays will be four frugal things and one frugal fail. That feels more real. If there’s ever a week when I cannot come up with a frugal fail…that’s when I have really figured this out.

Successes first:

1. Turkey. A week ago, you could do the pre-thanksgiving sale thing where you could buy a turkey for $0.99 a pound. This is perfect for me right about now. I need to make turkey stock as part of the pre-Thanskgiving prep around here. (I take Thanksgiving very very seriously.) Rather than just roasting it and subjecting my family to a whole roast turkey feast less than a month before Thanksgiving, I did something most people would consider crazy – I deboned the whole thing, ground the turkey and put it in the freezer in one pound increments, then put all the bones in my crockpot and made stock overnight. I figure I saved about $15 as follows:

What I got from a 14 lb turkey	How much it would have cost me if I purchased separately
5 lbs ground turkey	$25
10 cups turkey stock	$6 (for the cheap stuff) but could have been as much as $14 (for bone broth)
Cost of turkey $14	Cost (cheap stuff) $31

So I got ground turkey and I know what went into it (nothing questionable), I got stock and you literally cannot buy turkey stock at my grocery store, I would have had to settle for chicken. And it’s closer in quality to the stuff that would have cost $8 more. So, I really (in my brain) saved closer to $25.

Yes, it took some of my time, but not a lot. It’s hard to judge since I was also making dinner at the same time as I was breaking down and grinding the turkey, an hour at most. And mind you, I think this sorta stuff is fun, so I did not mind it at all. It’s not something I would do at regular turkey prices. But I can see myself jumping on another $0.99 per pound turkey at a later holiday sale.

2. The other thing I did I mentioned on Friday. I planned meals that made a really low grocery budget this week. I actually did pretty well, considering there were still a few impulse purchases in there (I cannot pass up a bogo sale, so I may have bought several pounds of pasta.) But the whole grocery run was only $106 to feed all three of us for a week of meals, plus extra food. I’m pleased about that. (I also discovered Sunday that the pulled pork chili made 8 servings, and there are only 3 of us, so the rest went right into the freezer for the future).

3. I saved on gas. I use grocery store points to get gas cheaper, but the way to make that really pay off is to always be as low on gas as I’m comfortable with, and use the points to get as much gas at a time as possible. Which, I did this weekend.

4. I ‘bought’ a free Amazon kindle book instead of deciding I needed it paperback. I kinda don’t love reading on my kindle, I’d rather have a real paper book in my hands any day. But this time I decided that I would just do it, because the kindle version was $0.00.

5. I just realized (I know, I said 4, but 5 is better…) I also bothered to take the grocery store survey this week. Which gets me 50 fuel points for later. It’s not much, but if I start doing it every 7 days, I can save even more on gas.

Frugal fail: I have to stop impulse buying ‘car treats’. Whenever I have a lot of driving to do, I am guilty of drive through stops for drinks or snacks on the way. This weekend I had several half hour drives (which is more than anything I usually do) and got a beverage here and a snack there…which add up. I have to start telling myself that I don’t get a treat just because I hate driving.

But I do, I hate driving.

This is much better than last week. I’m proud of me. Even with the fail.

Before we even get to the “how-tos” let’s talk about the “whys” of budgeting. A lot of people feel like budgets are these restrictive punishments telling them how they have to spend their money.

I personally see a budget as a way is to give you control over your money and the ability to make the choice where it goes, rather than just leaving it to chance.

A budget is where you plan what happens to your money. Yes, some of it has to go to necessities: food, rent, gas (and I would argue retirement and healthcare go here). But if you have a budget, you also get to plan what to do with what’s left. You get to dream, to set goals, and to plan your own life.

• Do you want to travel? Plan on the extra going to a small travel budget.
• Do you want to pay off all your debt? Plan on the extra going towards that?
• Do you want to save for a house? College? A new car? Then funnel your excess that way.
• Do you want to ??? anything??? This is where you get to decide.

But until you know what you are spending on necessities, and you don’t even know how much is really left, you can’t start to put your mind to what to do with the rest.

And, if you’re like 20% of Americans, you don’t have a budget at all. You don’t know what’s coming in, where it’s going or where you’re leaking money. That’s why you budget.

So that you have control over your own money – and YOU get to decide where it goes.

This week I am setting myself a challenge – how low can I go? Can I make a week’s worth of decent meals for as little as possible?

Strategies:

1. Shop my pantry/freezer first. What do I already have? That can be leftovers from last week (what can I do with the rest of the pulled pork?), other frozen foods (we have some sausage), and just plain ‘luck’ (last week I might have bought a frozen turkey for $0.99 a lb that I planned to turn into ground turkey and turkey stock.)
2. Lean on non-meat meals. I am trying to lean into a little less meat and a little more vegetable based proteins, and finding ways my family will appreciate them. I do have a fairly carnivorous husband though, so I am working little by little to get there.

What does this look like?

Saturday: Because we’re all going to be going in different directions on Saturday, I’m going to start this cheap week off strong with a scheduled “Every man for himself” kinda night. Not even going to meal plan. (need to buy – nothing)

Sunday: I have time today for something that might take longer. I’m thinking a beans and rice meal with the last of the frozen Italian sausage, a can or two of garbanzo beans, and a hearty tomato sauce. Oh, I’ll make a loaf of crusty bread with it! This sounds awesome. (need to buy – nothing)

Monday: always leftover day here. Same as usual. (need to buy – nothing)

Tuesday: I think I am going to make any pulled pork that still exists from last Thursday into pork chili and make cornbread with it. (need to buy – maybe some diced tomatoes? Milk for the cornbread?)

Wednesday: grilled. cheese. sandwiches. (on homemade bread from our bread machine) YUM. (need to buy – nothing, if we’re not picky about the cheese we use, we can clean out the cheese drawer)

Thursday: I plan to break down and grind turkey on Sunday, which will mean I have some for a quick dinner any night this week. I think I’m going to riff on Asian lettuce cups, and make a seasoned ground turkey and cabbage to eat over rice. (need to buy – scallions and maybe some Hoisin.)

Friday: The Halloween tradition here is comfort food for dinner and a Halloween movie night as a family. Nothing fancy. I’m making up a “Halloween baked pasta” this year. A tomato cream sauce (orange!) with either orange baby tomatoes or orange peppers baked in and a layer of cheese on top. I think I want mozzarella and parmesan (sadly, not orange.) I’m going to make it up as I go. I will need to buy … probably more tomato sauce, and some cheese.

I think I can get away with buying almost NOTHING for dinners this week, other than maybe some milk, a few cans of tomatoes and sauce, mozzarella cheese, and scallions. I wonder how low I can make this week’s grocery bill?

Yesterday I mentioned I’ve been sick. Quite sick really. So sick it forced me to take two whole days off of work.

I know, two days shouldn’t be that big a deal.

But I feel an amazing responsibility to be at my job. I’m a teacher, and if I’m not there, the curriculum doesn’t move forward, concepts aren’t learned, rhythm is broken. I teach high level classes, there aren’t people around who can just step in and teach it. And there are standards I have to meet by the end of the year.

Part of it is, if I’m being honest, I just like to know I’m needed. There aren’t that many people who can do what I do.

This week though, I had to step back. I was forced to take days for myself, and not push myself to get back ASAP. And while I didn’t feel 100% upon my return, I was 85%. I was healthy enough again that I wasn’t mad I had to go back. I had taken the time for me necessary to be ready to go back.

That is what I am thankful for today. The fact that I could take the pause, take care of myself, and get healthy again. The fact that my students at school could manage without me for a few days, my kid at home is old enough to let me really get rest, my husband could hold the fort down. The fact that I was forced to just rest.

I needed it.

I wouldn’t say that I am a perfectionist…because I am the least perfect person in the whole wide world. I’m disorganized, distractable, prone to laziness, certainly not detail oriented, and often wrong (but I will always admit it).

I hold myself to an incredibly high standard though.

I like to make sure I am always trying to do my best, especially at work. I hate messing up, especially if it was my fault. I especially hate messing up when it means letting someone else down. I like helping others and giving everything I’ve got. I hate saying no, when I know that I could do something well. I tend to overstretch myself, and I will always give to others without hesitation.

All of which means getting sick and being forced to slow down is really hard for me, and therefore the last week was a really tough one.

• I was not allowed to go to work for several days (I was contagious.)
• I was really tired and needed to rest – so I couldn’t do all the things I normally do, even at home.
• I had to say no to things that people asked of me.
• And now I’m behind and feel like I’m not doing my best.

This is a place I really struggle.

And if you know me, yes, I’m a hypocrite. Because I would normally be the first person to give anyone else grace. You miss an assignment because you were sick? Turn it in late, no problem. You’re struggling with the stress of applying to colleges, so you didn’t sleep last night? Sure take the quiz tomorrow. You need me to do an extra day of planning because you’ve had too much on your teacher-plate? No worries at all, happy to help.

But can I give myself that same grace? Not easily.

So I just have to tell myself, I am recovering. I was really sick. I can take some time to get my feet back under me. I don’t have to do all the things I usually do. I’m allowed to be imperfect and human.

Because we all are human. And I am allowed to be imperfect sometimes too.

I try to be frugal.

Why? Not because I think ‘he who dies with the most money in the bank wins’. And certainly not because I think it’s some sort of moral ideal to not spend money.

I try to be frugal 90% of the time, so that I can afford not to be that other 10% of the time.

Most of the time I will buy generic groceries, repair clothes when I can, and follow the discount so that I can save those extra pennies so that I can choose to renovate the pool in my backyard which really improves my quality of life in the summer.

Most of the time I will shop around for the things I need, avoid buying the things I don’t and not care a whit about name-brand stuff, so that I can decide that I want to go on the bigger, more amazing vacation.

And, even more importantly, most of the time I will find ways to reduce, reuse, and recycle what I already have before buying new so that if some unexpected expense comes up – I have the savings to keep it from being a stressor. I can just take care of it.

Being frugal means more flexibility when I want it, and less stress when life tries to throw it my way.

All of that is to say – I try to be frugal. But I’m having a hard time coming up with five ways I was frugal this week. Because, I always try…but some weeks it’s just easier than others.

What was frugal this week?

1. There’s always groceries – but this week, I was really sick. Like sleep all day in bed for two days sick. So, going to the grocery store was not gonna happen. I decided to order groceries for delivery. The delivery fee (and tip) almost made me get in my car and do it myself – but I was feeling *that bad* that I decided to just pay the extra. I did still shop the sales, and made sure to do it as cheaply as possible. But that was only a partial win.
2. I am still working out of my freezer, and am forcing myself to use frozen veggies before buying any new fresh. This week I actually only bought carrots and cabbage, and every other veggie will be out of the freezer.
3. I guess I saved gas? I mean, this feels like cheating, but because I’ve been so sick, I haven’t left the house in two days. Which does technically mean I’m saving gas. (See, I’m really stretching it here.)
4. …

No, I’m out – I didn’t get to 5 this week. And that’s ok. But it does really give me something to think about this coming week. What can I do to DEFINITELY get to five things that I did that saved me money? Because I like vacations, and pool upgrades, and having money for emergencies. So it’s a heavy focus this coming week.

Before we even think about a budget, we need to know how much money is coming in.

Besides, it’s much more satisfying to think about what we’re making than what we’re spending.

For the typical established employee, you get a paycheck every two weeks OR twice a month, which sounds like the same thing, but isn’t.

I get paid twice a month – on the 15th and the 30th. And then get occasional bonuses depending on my performance, extra work done, etc. But I always know I will see a paycheck a day or two before the 1st and another right around the middle of the month.

My husband on the other hand, get’s paid every two weeks, which means over the course of a year, there are 26 paychecks. Most months, he gets two – and then two months a year there’s an extra one. Which feels like bonus money. But these move around, some months they are at the beginning and the middle, some months they are middle-ish and end. And those extra months, they are the 1st, the 15th, AND the 29th. (Those are good months for the budget.)

But both of us have pretty predictable income per month, with occasional ‘extra’.

But, I am thinking about this money thing in terms of ‘new adults’ in the world. You might be students (high school or college) with a part time job with really sporadic income. You might do gig-work with money equal to how much time you spent working. You might have any number of part time jobs that you cobble together while you figure it all out. And all of that is ok, it’s just going to make it harder to figure out what your income is.

But you have to know what you make to figure out if you’re spending more than you’re making. (Remember rule #1 – spend less than you make)

So what’s your next money task? Find the records you need to figure out what you’ve made for the last three months (6 would be even better, if you can do it). That might be pay stubs, your online pay portal (if you have one) or just going in to your bank account and seeing what was deposited over the last three months from your job. And be able to answer these three questions:

1. How much did I make each month after taxes and all deductions? (How much actually was deposited into my bank account?)
2. Is it a consistent amount or does it vary?
3. What is the minimum I can be guaranteed to make each month?

This will give you a baseline for where to start managing your money.

Right now, don’t worry about the rest of the details, we’re just answering basic questions to be able to put all this in order. Money is always tied up with all sorts of emotions – and we just want facts right now. We can work on the emotions later.

I fear that Sunday posts may get repetitive, but Sundays are the foundation for my week. If I don’t start the week off prepped, the whole thing just starts off on the wrong foot.

Today’s reset:

• Catch up on laundry
• Prep breakfasts for the week.
  • I’m still loving the overnight oats/quinoa/chia thing I’ve been eating. I know I’ll get tired of it eventually, but if it’s still working, and it’s still good for me, I’m going to keep it up.
• Batch cook for the week.
  • Looking at the menu this week I need to make a batch of hamburger rolls and that’s it. I’m also craving something apple dessertish – maybe I’ll make some apple hand pies.
• Clean the kitchen for the week before bed.
  • I need that restart.

This week I also need to just take time for me. I’ve been a bit ill and this coming week is just going to be crazy. I need to take a pause for me today and make sure I fill my battery up before a long week ahead. Today I think that might look like a long bath and a good book.